Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Single mom?

I didn’t sign up for this role but if the shoe fits…

I recently moved out of the apartment I shared w/my bf and am now staying at my parents house. It’s been quite a change and I’ve been finding myself very sad & stressed out. The biggest source of stress is others telling me what to do with Ashlyn. She’s hungry…feed her. She’s thirsty…give her water. She’s this. She’s that. When did I suddenly become an idiot who doesn’t know how to take care of a baby? Also everyone apparently HAVE to be the one to rush to her aid when she’s been crying for all of 5 seconds. This happened the other day while I was nursing Ashlyn and my dad barged into my room. Now not only do I close the door (which it was at that time) but I lock it too.

This house is pretty big and not baby proofed. I spend all day chasing Ashlyn around since I can’t keep her contained. I’m actually surprised that she’s been in the family long enough for me to type this out. It’s hard doing everything on your own. Changing every diaper. Giving every bath. Nursing her. Feeding her solids. Making her food. I barely have time for myself. I know I just need time to adjust but it’s been rough so far.

I know at the end of the day that this is the best thing for my baby girl. She’s the most important thing in my life so I have to do what I can to make sure she’s got the life she deserves.

Well she’s here trying to get some cuddles and I love me some from her so time to say until later…

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